The Best Candidates for 2016

Happy Spring

What a nice, quiet day. So nice and quiet, in fact, I began singing the Zippety Do Dah song in my head. I also taught myself  how to create an animated gif, which you can see above. I know. It drove me crazy too as I typed this post. I was going for something else that had nothing to do with making a gif and got a little frustrated. Maybe next time, I’ll do one of Barbara Walters doing a farewell yackety-yack on The View and dedicate it to Elyse, over at Fifty-Four and a Half. She loves herself some Baba. Giggle, giggle. Or better yet, I can make a gif  of Oprah giving me two of all her favorite things or even much better yet, her writing me a check.

Anyhow, I’ve been checking the news out and reading a bit and see that Ben Carson, the pediatric neurosurgeon, may run for president in a coupla years. He’s even left his job at John Hopkins ’cause he’s been speaking all over the country and whatnot. Said he’d only run if God called him to and since everybody’s taking a liking to him, why, this is the sign he’s been needing to confirm God’s word. I reckon that’s how churches are built up too.

Hillary may run but my auntie said Hillary’s too far in age to be president. My thing with Hillary is she’s got herself a temper. And she’s a woman. After watching Scandal, I’m not real sure. But we’ll see. Bill would make a good First Lady though ’cause while he was getting stimulated during his presidency, that trickled into the economy so I may have to give Hillary some real thought. We may have to put up with Chris Christie, who likes to vent in public when folk, particularly the press, pose relevant questions to him. I’d like to see him run though ’cause he’s kinda interesting.

Though personally, I think Ernie and Burt from Sesame Street would make good candidates. What do you think?

Pretty Wings

 

"Maxwell" Watercolor on paper

“Maxwell” Watercolor on paper

The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.

Albert Einstein

Meet Keiko Matsui

Keiko Matsui. Google image.

Keiko Matsui. Google image.

I think you’ll love her if you’re not already familiar. I have a few CDs of hers. Simply came across her some years ago when I was browsing music in a store. So, when I was playing her in my car awhile back when driving a friend around, he fell in love with her but he had to buy his own CD ’cause I don’t loan out these kinda things. You just never see them again ’cause folk start thinking your stuff belongs to them.

Anyhow, Matsui is a jazz pianist or keyboardist, from Japan. I’ve always had this thing for the piano although I can’t play at all. I do, however, have a good ear for music. Now, Matsui’s been around for a good while. She looks young and you can say she is, really, at 52. She’s been on the circuit for 30 years, so you can be sure the music’s way better than good with her lasting that long.

Matsui is a naturalist and her titles reflect that. You may also be interested to know she’s an advocate for women’s health and contributes to several charitable causes, as well at to the Marrow Foundation. Royalties from CDs, in 2001 and 2004, were donated to the causes dear to her. You can visit Keiko Matsui’s website at www.keikomatsui.com.

It All Started with Underarm Shaving

The Supremes. Google Image.

The Supremes. Google Image.

Women have certainly come a long way. Depending on who you ask, some may say we’re outta control. Every now and again, I’ll pop in my Diana Ross & the Supremes CD and while that was before my time, I really like their singing. Those girls came a looooong way.

Back then too, women pretty much kept their clothes on. Times were different. You know, on the Republican conservative side when it came to dressing up. Even on stage to sing. I thought about this change short but hard, folks. How we dress and all, as in taking it off to make a dollar all started with underarm shaving. Seems like once that movement caught on, women folk started talking louder, smoking them thin cigarettes, spitting on the sidewalk and whatnot, we decided to go unclad in public. I mean, a woman can’t be all hairy and whatnot on the cover of Vogue or Penthouse. Just wouldn’t be a good visual, know what I mean?

Now, I’m on the fence about this whole skin is in movement. It’s just not fair to regular ole women folk, thinking they can mimmick their looks after Hollywood photoshopped pictures. It’s totally delusional and I know some men agree with me. I don’t care how liberated women are, some should absolutely refrain from those jeggings. Your reputation goes way down when you make certain decisions, okay? Even some thin women shouldn’t have a cashier ringing up such a purchase. You don’t get a pass on that because you’re small. Fair is fair.

When I was in Saudi Arabia, there were religious police. They gave you the business if you weren’t wearing your get-up right. Word was from the westerners (and you know how we exaggerate what we don’t understand), that you could go to jail for dress code infractions. Maybe. Maybe not. I didn’t test that theory. You feel me? Probably there should be similar positions in western countries, to uphold some kinda dress standard ’cause some women folk don’t know they’re in the wrong. That would be a good moonlighting job for me but even I would have to take some kinda test to prove I understand the rights and wrongs of fashion.

I can’t let you fellas off the hook either though and I’ll be straight to the point. Men folk, why is it the older you get, the higher those pants rise up toward your chest? What’s up with that, is my burning question.

Murder, She Wrote

Maxine looked out her window at the neighborhood from her second floor, blowing halos of smoke from those dark lips and lactating while the baby lay screaming in the crib. The perfect life of birthing a child and marrying Sammy hadn’t come together after all. Never had she figured he’d lay dead by her hands for wanting to leave. Sure did wish the child would cease all that hollering. She finished out the last of her smoke and pushed back from the window opening. Darn near tripped over Sammy, blood still warm, when she lifted the baby to feed it.

Copyright 2014 Totsymae

Getting the Juice

"Red Bikini" Acrylic on paper. Copyright 2013 Totsymae

“Red Bikini” Acrylic on paper. Copyright 2013 Totsymae

Good day, people. I’m wrapping up my time on the beach on the Georgia coast. Glory to my fabulousness but I had to bless spectators and haters with one last look before the summer heads completely south. I am the definition of Diva and can’t help myself. Okay? As I lie here looking oh so beautiful, I’m sipping on a tall glass of Hollywood juice and my insides are so utterly full, I just have to spill it. Hello?

As you perhaps know by now, Miley, as in Virus Cyrus (VC), has been dumped, kicked to the curb and recycled into the singles market. As we’re no longer in the Garden of Eden, the Now Ex didn’t take too well to all that nakedness and us knowing her in such a fashion. I do believe she’s sealed that oversized tongue in her mouth at this current time, haven’t you VC? But your daddy’s so very proud of you and I wish all of you happy therapy sessions in the future because you’re not trying to hear it now, are you girl? Well, strip it until you rip it and do you until you get a clue that thick is in and you’re too thin to be taking your clothes off before the public. We’re not hardly that desperate to see skin. Okay? You need to come down south and eat a good meal or two. Alright? And bring the president with you because he’s looking rather thin these days.

Rumor has it that Now Ex was cheating but what’s the biggy, really? Miley was openly cheating with the public with all that gyrating on stage. I know I supported you initially, Miley but I get tired of people on the swift and you’re on the list, sweetie. And before I take a break from you, I do hope you’re on the organ donor’s list because I’m real sure somebody could put that tongue to better use. Did I mention I was tired of you, Miley?

People, as I lie my beautifulness here and continue to bless the public, I want you to know that I’m in mourning over the separation of Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones. Catherine, I think you’re beautiful and I wish you and Michael the best for the rest of your lives. I never thought people divorced at 60-plus but it happens. I know the papers haven’t been filed but well…Umph, umph umph…(Sniff, sniff)

Kimye, as in Kim and Kanye. I must admit, you two made yourselves a beautiful baby. However, I feel terribly sorry for you, Kim. Your baby’s daddy  is a nut who likes to cut up in public. To put it more accurately, ‘cut a fool’ as Totsy would say. Not even you deserve that and especially not your daughter. Be blessed, you and North West, and know which way is up because when Kanye sees the paparazzi, you and North will need to know when to duck. Okay?

As always, it’s been a pleasure. I want to thank my congregation of bloggers for reading me. Lord have mercy on all those who aren’t nearly as fabulous as me. Amen.

Always True,

Beatrice from Apartment 7B

Good Girl Gone

Beatrice Goes Hollywood. Copyright 2013 Totsymae

Beatrice Goes Hollywood. Copyright 2013 Totsymae

Hello, people. No applause, please. I am just returning from the state of madness, namely the VMA Awards, where Miley, according to some, made the devil smile. The wild child star turned superstar has blossomed into a thorn and basking like never before in the limelight. While I was sitting in the $5.00 seats with regular people, I was changing lives as they broke their necks trying to see how divalicious I looked. VMA finally had to put the LAPD on standby because it was bumper to bumper trying to see all this fabulousness in one take. Okay?

Now, back to Miley. I say whatever’s clever. It’s your life and you’ve been trying to prove it to the public on so many levels, I don’t think you’re as free as you think you are. However, if Madonna’s doing it at 60, 20 is even better. Alright? I really don’t know what to tell you or the people who are so disappointed that you traded your role model robe for a bikini and red lipstick.

Don’t hold your mouth agape, people. Live your life and let Miley’s play out however it may. Don’t raise your children in front of the TV and allow them to find their identities in people they most likely will never meet. It’s your own fault you’re disappointed. You really shouldn’t raise your children to look up to anything human. We all disappoint and, as my pastor at Saint Philips Holy Trinity of Light Tabernacle of Faith says…Where was I?…Oh, yes, we all entertain Michael on occasion. We fall short and backwards, as Totsy did recently, doing whatever we think feels good.

I have, Miley, in the meantime, taken a poll on certain places where botox may suit you the next time you prance it around stage.

Love and  Kisses,

The Bea

More Music and Art & a Little Less Talk

I have another game. First, I have to tell you the answer to the previous game we played. The image in that post for the first game is a portrait of Marilyn Monroe. The music artist is Sheila E. Did the words of the song match up with her life a little? They did to me. Anyhow, Sheila E is one helluva drummer and always looks sexy while doing it. The E stands for Escovedo and her father is Pete Escovedo, also a musician. If you’re familiar with Prince, you may recognize the Minneapolis sound. If you don’t know Prince’s music, you have been terribly deprived and I feel so deeply sorry for you. Congrats to Linda, at The Good, The Bad, The Worse. She guessed everything right. She is one hip diva. Not that the rest of you aren’t. She’s just probably more hip or something like that. She probably takes diva pills or wears a patch. Who knows…

Anyhow, watch Sheila E perform Glamorous Life and do her thing on the drums in this video:

To go on with our game today, we’re recognizing another musical talent. I surely hope you haven’t been deprived twice. If so, I’m gonna have to write out a bootleg prescription for some Get A Life. I just had me some the other day. The low dosage, that is. It really should be easy, folks.  For the prize, I’m gonna blow you a nice little kiss.